Year End Thoughts

International News

First, I wanted to update those that don't know yet that the law banning Americans from adopting Russian children has passed. President Putin signed it late last week. This is horribly devastating to many people. We are so sorry for your loss, and this seemingly insurmountable obstacle.

For us, we are moving forward. Currently there have been no restrictions put in place with Canada, and we hope, with all our hearts, that it stays that way.

Progress and Updates

So a few updates for us and our process.

We're getting things ready to courier off to the agency on the 2nd. We have a few things we need to send, including hand-written reference letters, many photographs, and copies of legal paperwork.

Next week we have our final home study interview and home inspection! Today was been a day full of cleaning, organizing and purging. We're managed to get our spare room aka gym aka future child's room squared away a bit and now I want to fill it with a little person!

As for our immigration paperwork, we got the letter saying our application is being worked on and we should have our approval in the next 2 weeks! This is great!! This is normally one of the items that can delay the dossier being ready for translation, so I'm thrilled to know we'll have the decision in the first 2 weeks of January. Yay!

We'll soon be coming into the part of the process that is out of our hands. And that's going to be hard for me! If you know me, you know I like to handle things so having it in someone else's control. Especially something so very important to us, our hearts, our family and our future.

So once our home study interviews are done, our social worker needs to write a report. The report will be to either recommend us for adoption or not. This report will go the province and they, in turn, will decide if we are provincially approved or not. And that's what will cue the agency to have our file translated and sent to Russia.

We're hoping to have our report by the end of January, and hear from the province in February. I'm not sure how long it'll take but I'm going to be as optimistic as possible!

I have it in my head and heart that we will be registered in Russia by the first week of April. I really hope so!

Matters of The Fragile Heart

If you only knew how hard it was to not be able to realize the dream of parenthood. We see so many people land in it accidentally. We see people want it and have it happen with almost no effort. We also see people deal with infertility and succeed.

Adam and I have cried. We have stayed home when we couldn't handle being around kids. We have cuddled children and left crying silently trying not to show our tears. We have held our tongues when people take what they have for granted. We have put up with asinine comments from people who have no clue how hard it is. We struggle every holiday. We struggle when we see the adorable clothes at the Superstore. We struggle when we see someone doing something that we dream of one day doing. We struggle with our ages. We struggle not knowing what will come of things, because you never know.

I tell you this so you know and understand that adoption is something to be taken very seriously. I tell you this so you understand that it's not trendy to adopt - it's a way to parent.

Most importantly I tell you this so you know, more than anything, that we do this for us. This is for our family - so we can build one. This is to make our dreams come true. This is to give us a child to raise, educate, teach and learn from. This is so we can be surprised by the amazing person our child grows into. This is so we can go to soccer games, dance recitals and school plays. This is so we can hide Christmas presents and Easter Eggs. This is so we can hold and soothe them when they hurt.

Adoption is for us. We are not saving anyone. We are not rescuing a child from a down-trodden life. We are bringing them into our home to grow with us, so we can cherish one another and wrap each other in love, cuddles and hugs.

We are not heroes.

We just want to be a Mommy and Daddy.

International News

The adoption word is buzzing with day-to-day updates of the Russian bill to ban American adoptions. As I had mentioned in a previous post, we aren't sure what to make of everything yet. Even if the bill passed President Putin it's not clear how long it will take to have an effect.

What does this mean for Canadians? Well, at first I wasn't so sure. We have a close relationship with the USA but we also have a relationship with Russia. To be honest, I'm not that good with politics! But here's what we do know for sure:

In 2011 a Private Member Bill from a member of the Liberal Party in Quebec, Bill C-339, was brought up. This Bill was similar to the one the USA had recently passed, and could cause a similar adoption situation for us.

The Bill did not pass last time. While this is encouraging, recent developments with the USA and Russia could very well influence our policies and draw our government's attention to that bill.

We are very nervous and very scared. We don't know what this means, or if it were to pass what would come of it.

The idea of not being able to fulfil our adoption path is heart-wrenching. We fully believe that this is the right path for us and we are certain we are doing the right thing.

Simply changing to another country is not an option. Yes, we would look, but we've already done that. We chose Russia for many reasons and when something feels right you need to trust it. Russia is right for us, so we ask that our friends and families understand that telling us to simply change countries is like telling an infertile to "relax." Please don't.

We don't have many options left on the road to parenthood. So please think good thoughts and hope that we make it through.

The Week Before Christmas

It's a quiet, blustery week here.

We received our letters from the bank that we need for the agency, but we had to ask them to re-send them as there was an error. But it's till one more thing (almost) done!

My main point of the post today is to share a news story regarding Russia-USA adoptions. This story has broken on CNN.

I decided, after reading, to take a look at the Moscow Times to see what their news was reporting. This story seems to include the premise that the proposed ban is in retaliation, and this opinion story is very much opposed to the ban. And this one other story seems to have a good explanation of both sides.

I'm not sure what to make of the news quite yet. I hate to see the potential for families taken away from the children. The thought that childless couples would not be able to build a family with the help of Russia breaks my heart, as I can't imagine what would happen if the option was taken away from Adam and I.

However, I know enough to know that I'm not aware of all sides of the story, and that there are details that I'm not privy to.

Let's hope that, no matter what, things work out for the best for all involved. Perhaps Couple X are meant to adopt a little girl in the Ukraine but hadn't been looking there. Perhaps Little Boy X is meant for a family in Russia who will be inspired by the ban to reach out to the orphanage. I don't know. But I am reminded that the path to success look something like this:

Immigration - Check!

The Immigration paperwork is done!

Adam will pop it into the mail tomorrow!

The weekend has been a low-key one. I am finally able to keep down solid foods for 24 hours (hooray!) and we managed to sleep and relax.

There isn't much to be done for our home study until January which is great, so the next couple of weeks will focus mostly on paperwork for the agency and getting set for our home inspection (an excuse to do some cleaning-out and re-organizing).

Adam and I are trying to decide if we want to pick up the Rosetta Stone program for learning Russian. We'd love to hear feedback if anyone has used one of their programs as there are mixed reviews out there right now.

We would also like to thank our readers for following our journey. As it stands we have readers from all over the world and it's a wonderful feeling. Thank you so much!

Mailed!

Adam popped our medicals into the mail today! 2 of the forms went to our Social Worker and 1 went to our agency.

I (Pam) have been battling the flu so the only actual effort I've been able to put in is sitting at the computer not moving too fast! But nonetheless, things are moving along.

Our CIC paperwork will be in the mail on Monday! Everything is being notarized over the weekend.

We spoke to our bank last night and requested the paperwork we need from them (basically a letter saying how awesome we are).

We've started choosing which pictures we will send to Russia - you need many and they are pretty specific. You need photos of each room in your home, your pets, yourselves, your families, etc. You need to send two identical sets - one for your dossier (which is reviewed by Russia's Ministry of Education and helps them find a good match for you) and one for your court file (which is taken very seriously as the judge has complete control over granting the adoption).

As the holiday season is starting, all government offices are slowing down and some will be closed for a time. This will slow things down a bit, but we hope it will give us a chance to have some free time together as well. Adopting is a lot of busy work (at least to this point it has been) and between that and our work schedules we haven't had much down time. We'll have everything done that we can, but we are looking forward to a bit of a break where we can walk in the snow, play cards and cook a nice meal without worrying about what needs doing the second we're done. Perhaps there will be enough time to even see the new Twilight movie!! I've never been this late seeing one!

I'll wrap this post with the link to another blog site. Mrs. Slick and her husband have recently adopted a little boy from Russia.

She hasn't blogged her way through it as her agency has strict policies about that, but now that they've come home she has been catching us up piece by piece - and it's a wonderful story! Congratulations to them!

Medicals are D-O-N-E!!!!

Just spoke to the doctor's office and my medical is now done! So I'll be picking mine up in an hour or so.

I (Pam) called our Social Worker and let her know, so we've booked our final interview and home inspection for January 9th!

Almost done this part and I'm over the moon happy today!

Citizenship and Immigration Canada - A Guide

Immigration is definitely a large part of International Adoption. Obviously!

This post is mainly just a how-to for this part of the adoption process. Since I know we're not the only ones going through it!

We have been told by our agency to start the process now. We need to have pre-approval (aka Part I approval) before we can be registered in a region in Russia, so it was off to the paperwork!

Let me just say that CIC paperwork is a little confusing at first glance. The website is decent so it just took some time to sort through it and figure out what route to go and how how to do it.

To start with, you need to choose between two processes:

1. Immigration aka sponsorship, or
2. Citizenship

This page explains the fundamental differences.

Our agency has quite a bit of experience with the Sponsorship route - many families have chosen it in the past as it's been known to be quicker. However, Adam and I have chosen the Citizenship process as we would prefer our child become Canadian right away.

There are 2 parts to the process.
Part I: Done in country . . . now
Part II: Done in whatever country the adoption is finalized; in our case this would be in Russia.

PART I

There are 3 steps in Part I:

1. Application Documents
2. Pay Application Fee
3. Submit Application

PART I, Step 1: Application Documents

There are 3 documents:
Checklist: http://www.cic.gc.ca/english/pdf/kits/citizen/CIT0484E.pdf
Form: http://www.cic.gc.ca/english/pdf/kits/citizen/CIT0010E.pdf
Instruction Manual (very useful!) http://www.cic.gc.ca/english/information/applications/guides/CIT0009ETOC.asp

If you follow the instructional manual it will go pretty smoothly, but I'll outline some key points anyway.
Only one of the prospective Adoptive Parents applies, although you will need to list both of your info.
You need to include a bunch of source documents to prove you are who you say you are.
For the one applying you'll need 2 pieces of ID

• a driver’s licence
• a health insurance card
• a copy of your passport page containing your photo and personal details, etc.

For each of the prospective Adoptive Parent you'll need to provide proof of Citizenship using one of the following:

• Provincial/territorial birth certificate
• Certificate of Canadian citizenship
• Certificate of naturalization
• Certificate of Registration of Birth Abroad
• Certificate of retention issued between January 1, 1947 and February 14, 1977

But don't forget to include proof of legal name change if you're married! (meaning your marriage certificate)

And you have to get all these document copies authenticated! We'll be using our lawyer who's a Notary Public to do the notarizing for us (he's wonderful). You're options are:

• a commissioner of oaths
• a notary public
• a justice of the peace 

But a simple stamp won't do! Nope! They need to say “I certify that this is a true copy of the original document.” AND it needs to have the following:

• the name of the original document,
• the date of the certification,
• his or her name,
• his or her official position or title, and
• his or her signature.

PART I, Step 2: Pay Your Application Fees

You can pay at a bank, or (like every other bill in the 21st century) you can pay your application fee online. No matter which process you chose it's $100.00 for Part I (no idea at this point what it is for Part II). 

The key part for this is that you MUST include the receipt with your application. MUST! It has a barcode on it, so they scan that and that's the barcode by which they file your application.

If you're as paranoid as I am you'll print off three copies and keep them in a page protector and THEN email it to yourself. But that's just me.

PART I, Step 3: Pay Your Application Fees

Package it all up and mail it off to:

Citizenship and Immigration Canada
Case Processing Centre—Sydney—ADOPTION
P.O. Box 10030
Sydney, Nova Scotia B1P 7C1

In case that's not direct enough for you, the website gives you this helpful little picture:

Next Steps

When your application is received you'll receive a letter saying the office got it. After Part 1 is assessed, you'll get another letter with the decision. THIS is the letter you send to the agency.

If your application is approved, you will be told when and where to submit Part 2. In our case that will be at the Canadian Embassy in Russia. We'll get an entry VISA in our LO's Russian Passport and then be on our way. It'll take a little bit for the Citizenship Certificate to be processed and arrive at home for us.

So that's it! A long but brief (hehe) look at the CIC process. Hope this is helpful to someone!

Medicals

And we're . . . practically done. For now.

Adam's medical paperwork is done and we're waiting for 2 blood results to come back on me. It's odd they didn't come back with the first batch!

But otherwise we are done for this part of the process.

So the medicals included:

1. Family history
2. Personal medical history
3. Blood tests
4. Urine tests
5. Hearing tests (our GP wants to refer us to an ENT Specialist who would refer us to an audiologist, but we skipped that and saw a private audiologist - much quicker)
6. Eye tests (more extensive for Adam than myself)
7. Letter from our Reproductive Endocrinologist (aka Infertility doc)
8. Letter from my Neurologist
9. Vaccinations

Every one was very supportive of our decision and some didn't charge us because we're adopting! How wonderful is that? (And very much in the Christmas Spirit as well). 

As Adam mentioned in the last post, we had hoped to have our home inspection/final interview done before Christmas, but due to a delay in getting our medical stuff done it looks like that will have to wait until the new year. I'm still holding out hope that the final tests will come back in the next 24 hours making it a slight possibility, but it's not likely. But at least we're getting there!

Once this part is done we'll start working on the list for our agency. Did we mention we signed the contract? No? Well - we did!!!! Very exciting!!

Progress!

Another Week, another series of medical appointments. Eyes and ears checked, heading through the process. It's looking like we won't have our homestudy done until post-holidays, which is a bit later than we hoped, but we're still moving slowly along. We've sent in our first round of forms/payments to our agency while we wait on finalizing things here.

Our cats are thrilled to be in the Christmas spirit - here's the oldest one on his Christmas-themed cat blanket:

That's one of the less grumpy pictures...

The younger one likes the Christmas trees, here looking at our little advent tree:

Pam and I have made it a tradition to alternate days on the advent calendar (our little advent house is big enough to hold small candies and little gifts), which we will share with our child some day. None of those increasingly terrible advent chocolates for us....I swear they didn't used to be so bad.

We're also starting slow on learning some Russian.  We've enjoyed listening to some learn Russian audio tracks in the car, trying with mixed success repeating back words and sounds (I really need to roll my "r"...never could figure it out for French, but maybe I can fake it well enough). We bought a book, the cover of which is hopefully not offensive to actual Russians:

Should be interesting. Before we go over, I want to have "Russian Days" at home, where we try to communicate only in Russian. I anticipate using How do you say... a lot, is that cheating? Also,"How do you say" turns out to be a very awkward phrase in Russian, so it will be good practice.

New Post Coming Soon!

Hopefully today or tonight - it's been a busy week! Stay tuned!